Friday, December 23, 2011

The amount of work that goes into the mop on my head

Almost any woman who bothers doing their hair will say that a good hair day will make or break their evening. I've got really fine hair that has NO volume so for me, it's a 10-step process.

Step 1- Blowdry hair with Conair thermocare round hair brush with roots lifted

Step 2- Shake so much Chi or G2B volumizing powder in hair, I can't breathe. Stop when lungs are full and hacking commences. Seal in place with G2B Fat-tastic hairspray

Step 3- Backcomb until hair is standing on end. When I look like the bride of Frankenstein, it's ready

Step 4- Add another couple squirts of hairspray for good measure

Step 5- Look in mirror, cringe, and start to get a part going on, use the round brush to start smoothing out the frizz-fest

Step 6- Straighten the ends with a small straightener.

Step 7- Section off a part on top to smooth out, make sure the back is poofy, flip over the smooth part so the rat's nest is hidden

Step 8- Add more Chi Powder with spray to make sure the hair stays in place (If I don't do this, the back-combing won't stay in place and it'll go flat).

Step 9- Wonder why I don't just accept my straight hair or get a perm. Ponder for a few moments as I finally get my breath back from the haze of hairspray in my room

Step 10- Step out into the rain/snow without an umbrella, curse Mother Nature, wear hat because the hour of work is rinsed out. Give up.

On top of all this, I have to attempt to remember who likes what hairstyle. New guy for example, hates the feel of the Chi powder (a heads up: it really does make your hair feel disgusting), D believed my extensions weren't fake and hauled on them (ow), and going out means planning for the Atlantic weather as much as possible.

It's fun being a woman, right?

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