Why you'll want to read me

Besides the obvious fact that I am just that amazing, here's the top-ten reason you want to read me:

1) I'm brutally honest - about me, you, life, my bathroom habits (not usually but if I'm sick - you'll hear it).  I don't hold back...even if I'm ashamed, embarrassed, or so overjoyed I can't write well!

2) I'm sarcastic but not cynical.  I'll make my quips but I also believe in changing the world, not just complaining about it.

3) I'm gluten and dairy free (allergies) so I'll post recipes that don't suck.  They're also cheap.  Stop kissing my feet.  Seriously, you're drooling.

4) Gordon Ramsay follows me on Twitter.  (by now, you're probably shaking with my amazing-ness, right?)

5) The only two times I was ever skinny in my life, I made myself throw up and ate under 800 calories a day.  I don't do that anymore and will never promote that lifestyle.  I believe healthy is beautiful at all sizes.

6) I got married at 19 to an abusive jerk who told me I was stupid.  In May, I will graduate from university with a Graduating Student Leadership Award.

7) If you ask a question, I will always answer it.

8) I love all animals but they are not my babies - I will not carry my turtle in my purse.  I will never own a tiny dog...I will have a big, manly dog and I will name it Princess Fifi or something equally girly.

9) I do not drink (anymore), smoke, do drugs, or sleep around...I have been drunk many times, smoked, used drugs, and have slept around.  I will never judge because I've probably done it - and if I haven't, it's because I didn't know about it. 

10) And the final (and best) reason why you should follow me is...I'm NOT a mommy blogger.  I have no rugrats, I don't bear stretch marks and my uterus is, and will always remain empty.

You love me now, don't you!  Cheers -Sammy

No comments:

Post a Comment