Of course, I've said it before - the best brainwaves come to me while peeing. I don't understand the bladder/brain connection but I'll take it.
I've 'let go' of a friend recently - he's now in my phone as "Just don't text/answer" because I don't have caller ID, he's off my FB, not a Twitter-addict, so the bridge's haven't been burned - but they've been detoured around me.
I finally figured out why I did this though. My ex-husband used to always think the worst of me - I wasn't smart enough, pretty enough, was doing things wrong, I broke something, anything he could use to attack me, he did and he was good at it. I never felt lower than when he went in for a verbal attack and I really was worthless in my mind...and perhaps in his. I was too emotional, always overreacting, crazy, whatever he could throw at me, he did it in spades.
Now, don't get me wrong, my friend has NOT done that...but he does jump to thinking the worst with me before he even realizes what he's doing...and I internalize it and begin to question myself, stress about it, and feel badly for it. I started to question if it was an image problem - something I was doing or saying that was 'wrong'...but even if it was, for someone to think the worst of a friend - that doesn't add up.
Fact is, I don't want to be the person that screws everything up - heard that one before. I don't want to be the person who is constantly looking over her shoulder either, wondering if what I do is right or wrong or perceived a certain way. Thanks but no thanks. I did that years ago and it doesn't work - people think what they want to think.
So I figured it out in my 30-second bathroom run - and if I thought I could change how I felt about this, I probably would - but sometimes, it's easier to let go for awhile, reevaluate everything and go from there.