Saturday, April 28, 2012

Hold on or let go

There are moments I tend to avoid - the awkward bumping into the ex moment, the moment where you have a huge chunk of spinach in your teeth right before doing an interview, the moment where you break down over something stupid just because it's a bad day and the moment when you give up on a friendship.

Like every other relationship, friendships take two people - and sometimes, due to extenuating circumstances or complete stupidity, friendships break. Sometimes it's an 'uncontested' break - the two friends just stopped hanging out, had different interests etc. Sometimes, it's petty - jealousy, finding a boyfriend/girlfriend. Other times, it's just because while one person is trying - there's just absolutely no reception. There's only so many times (And I'll admit - people get a LOT) a person can be rejected, dejected, passed off, excused, etc etc ETC...before it's just enough.

I'd rather look like an idiot and attempt to keep a friend through trials and stress in their life, but there comes a point when I give up.

I'll never admit to being 'the perfect friend' - If stressed, I'm a terrible person to be around. I snore. I get irritated easily. I have the attention span of a blowfly. I constantly change my mind. I can even be mean sometimes - that's right, downright mean...but I'm persistent. I want to be engaged in my friends lives, do what I can to help - even just offer cookies or coffee breaks. I want to do what I can to support them - but after awhile, it starts to get really personal.

So, I give up...funny how it's easier to think those words than it is to actually write them.

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