I am an awesome person...I truly believe that. That being said, this awesome person is single on Valentines Day and honestly, it kinda rocked. Last year, I was in NFLD missing my boyfriend (oh wait, I wasn't because I am a terrible girlfriend and felt guilty for kissing another guy before I left)...anyways, I learned that I need to be single for a very long time to grow up and respect myself and others more. So being single is a) a choice and b) amazing. Why, you ask? Here goes:
1) I have yet to shave my legs this week. Okay, this may or may not be a lie...but you know what - stubble is easy to deal with. It's not sexy when I look like Chewie - but I just call it an extra layer of warmth.
2) Lingerie sucks - I'm pretty sure I still have a thong stuck in my ass. Those bras are painful and oh yeah, it all gets taken off anyways! Yes, it's fun but looking back on it - I wanted sweat pants, not a naughty Professor Snape outfit.
3) I'm a selfish human being hellbent on taking over the world - I need my me-time to do this.
4) Pooping is SO much easier - Have you ever had really bad gas at night (or had to poop and the bathroom is right next to the bedroom) and been afraid that someone would hear? Yeah...you have. Your eyes start to water, you're pretty sure you're going to explode...but you've gotta be a lady...I don't have that problem.
5) I'm not exactly healthy - Okay, so this may not encompass everyone but as you know, I've been pretty sick lately...having a guy around who wants anything but veggies probably wouldn't help. Oh and the symptoms? Not pretty. I don't want to be around me sometimes.
6) PJ's - I love flannel pyjamas and onesies (as in, with feet). I can wear this single and not feel bad. Every night. Every day.
7) I can travel - even though I've been sick, I still plan to go to Guatemala in December for 3 months. I would have a much harder time doing this if I were away from a significant other...adois!
8) I can flirt. 2 words: Spanish Language. It's sexy. Just saying...thing is, I don't really flirt because I don't want to have that attention.
9) I can focus on the things that are important - school is my priority. When I say I don't have time, I really do mean I don't have time.
10) Being single is awesome because it means I get to grow up without hurting someone in the process. I can figure myself out and maybe settle down someday...but not today. Or tomorrow. The day after isn't looking good either.
11 more minutes and Valentines Day is over. Happy February 15th everyone!
The worst person to hurt is a writer because we will always do what we do best and everyone will know your dirty little secrets...even the one's you don't actually have.
Thursday, February 14, 2013
It's Valentines Day and my Granny Panties are on!
Good evening blog world!
I read an article tonight about picking up a fling on V-Day. It had the same old stuff - be safe, use protection, be polite and to 'keep the drinks flowing." I'm assuming they mean alcohol...which I have some issues with.
Now, don't get me wrong - I'm not prudish. I have woken up a few times, paying homage to the porcelain princess and wondering how I can (graciously) kick last night's leftovers to the curb.
That being said, some of my biggest mistakes have been while I'm drinking. After the alcohol wears off, the 'wow, did I really just do that?' sets in. It's not unrealistic expectations that I'm going to fall in love - but I'm definitely more jaded about love than I once was. Part of this might be my love them, leave them, drunk dial them, leave them, attitude. It adds up over time.
Second point - keeping drinks flowing seems to be something men do. A lot. To women. Pressuring them,. To drink. Get it? Drunk girls = easy lay. If you don't agree, that's fine but sadly - it's an equation that seems to be quite popular with the asshats of our society. Women, you don't want to keep the drinks flowing - you want to stay pretty darn sober.
Third point - if you can't do it sober, don't do it. My only regrets are doing things I wouldn't do sober. There's not many of those...but the ones that are on there are the ones I usually felt bad about. They're the ones where I found out the guy had a family or a few other instances where things went horribly wrong. Drinking has led to my being arrested once (underage so awhile ago), in trouble with campus security, getting slapped in the face by a guy and not knowing what to do (I ran away into the cold in -30 weather and had to wait for a taxi...in a dress). Being sober has it's advantages because you're your own smart, wonderful self. If you need to drink to hook up, reevaluate things.
That being said, there's also the drinking buddy. He's the guy I call, we drink, he talks Spanish, I swoon...oh wait...yeah, that went to hell. Not only did I lose a fun guy, I lost one of my closest friends because I. Was. An. Idiot. I don't believe that most f-buddies remain on good terms. I just don't. I don't have stats, I do have personal experience and for me (in this instance), it's enough. It's easy to mistake sex with love...and easier to mistake it with love when you're friends with someone.
Oh, and let's not forget the booty call. Way to make a person only matter for their genitals. Fact is, if you can't invite them to your houseparty/night out/dinner/anything, you've said "I only like you for your penis/vag" and sometimes that hurts. Furthermore, it can take awhile for people to feel used...but when they do, IT SUCKS!
Maybe I'm just growing up or maybe I've finally stopped worrying about being wanted because I love myself. Maybe I've just realized that being alone has HUGE advantages (do you know how long it's been since I've shaved my legs?) and that I enjoy my 'me' time. Or maybe it's just that I've seen one too many broken hearts.
I'm not a one-night stand kind of girl, don't booty call me - and for the love of all that is good - make sure you can do whatever you're doing sober before you THINK of doing it drunk. Don't cry over something that can be avoided by grabbing water instead of tequila. Make mistakes, grow from it but don't be afraid to not make mistakes and learn from other (more spontaneously stupid) people's decisions.
Have a Happy Valentines Day everyone! If you're single, my next blog is a Top 10 list of why it rocks!
I read an article tonight about picking up a fling on V-Day. It had the same old stuff - be safe, use protection, be polite and to 'keep the drinks flowing." I'm assuming they mean alcohol...which I have some issues with.
Now, don't get me wrong - I'm not prudish. I have woken up a few times, paying homage to the porcelain princess and wondering how I can (graciously) kick last night's leftovers to the curb.
That being said, some of my biggest mistakes have been while I'm drinking. After the alcohol wears off, the 'wow, did I really just do that?' sets in. It's not unrealistic expectations that I'm going to fall in love - but I'm definitely more jaded about love than I once was. Part of this might be my love them, leave them, drunk dial them, leave them, attitude. It adds up over time.
Second point - keeping drinks flowing seems to be something men do. A lot. To women. Pressuring them,. To drink. Get it? Drunk girls = easy lay. If you don't agree, that's fine but sadly - it's an equation that seems to be quite popular with the asshats of our society. Women, you don't want to keep the drinks flowing - you want to stay pretty darn sober.
Third point - if you can't do it sober, don't do it. My only regrets are doing things I wouldn't do sober. There's not many of those...but the ones that are on there are the ones I usually felt bad about. They're the ones where I found out the guy had a family or a few other instances where things went horribly wrong. Drinking has led to my being arrested once (underage so awhile ago), in trouble with campus security, getting slapped in the face by a guy and not knowing what to do (I ran away into the cold in -30 weather and had to wait for a taxi...in a dress). Being sober has it's advantages because you're your own smart, wonderful self. If you need to drink to hook up, reevaluate things.
That being said, there's also the drinking buddy. He's the guy I call, we drink, he talks Spanish, I swoon...oh wait...yeah, that went to hell. Not only did I lose a fun guy, I lost one of my closest friends because I. Was. An. Idiot. I don't believe that most f-buddies remain on good terms. I just don't. I don't have stats, I do have personal experience and for me (in this instance), it's enough. It's easy to mistake sex with love...and easier to mistake it with love when you're friends with someone.
Oh, and let's not forget the booty call. Way to make a person only matter for their genitals. Fact is, if you can't invite them to your houseparty/night out/dinner/anything, you've said "I only like you for your penis/vag" and sometimes that hurts. Furthermore, it can take awhile for people to feel used...but when they do, IT SUCKS!
Maybe I'm just growing up or maybe I've finally stopped worrying about being wanted because I love myself. Maybe I've just realized that being alone has HUGE advantages (do you know how long it's been since I've shaved my legs?) and that I enjoy my 'me' time. Or maybe it's just that I've seen one too many broken hearts.
I'm not a one-night stand kind of girl, don't booty call me - and for the love of all that is good - make sure you can do whatever you're doing sober before you THINK of doing it drunk. Don't cry over something that can be avoided by grabbing water instead of tequila. Make mistakes, grow from it but don't be afraid to not make mistakes and learn from other (more spontaneously stupid) people's decisions.
Have a Happy Valentines Day everyone! If you're single, my next blog is a Top 10 list of why it rocks!
Wednesday, February 13, 2013
What would you tell your child?
I am not a child person as many of you know - I don't like kids. That being said, I started thinking how people criticize themselves. I am guilty of it: My hair is in an awkward stage, I'm not pretty enough, thin enough, I'm grumpy, I'm not able to maintain a relationship, my feet are gross...I could go on and on...
The problem with this thinking is that it's completely destructive - so my new rule is "Would I say it to a child?" Although I'm not a 'kid person', I'm great with kids (I don't know why or how but my mom was an amazing role model). I would never tell a kid they weren't attractive or they were awkward. I wouldn't dream of telling a kid they were too fat. So I'm putting the kid gloves on myself!
There's some harder things though: would you tell a child it's okay to go without sleep to finish a project? Would you tell a child it's okay to indulge for the third night in a row on pizza and (root) beer? Would you tell a child not to stand up for what's right? We tell children ideas that are so pure and wholesome but as adults, we often forget to listen to what we are saying. We forget that we need to parent ourselves and be responsible for our own well being.
So, if I'm going to have a happy 2013, being positive is a good start! Stop self-bullying - it's not healthy. Instead, smile and remind yourself that your inner child needs some love!
The problem with this thinking is that it's completely destructive - so my new rule is "Would I say it to a child?" Although I'm not a 'kid person', I'm great with kids (I don't know why or how but my mom was an amazing role model). I would never tell a kid they weren't attractive or they were awkward. I wouldn't dream of telling a kid they were too fat. So I'm putting the kid gloves on myself!
There's some harder things though: would you tell a child it's okay to go without sleep to finish a project? Would you tell a child it's okay to indulge for the third night in a row on pizza and (root) beer? Would you tell a child not to stand up for what's right? We tell children ideas that are so pure and wholesome but as adults, we often forget to listen to what we are saying. We forget that we need to parent ourselves and be responsible for our own well being.
So, if I'm going to have a happy 2013, being positive is a good start! Stop self-bullying - it's not healthy. Instead, smile and remind yourself that your inner child needs some love!
Monday, February 11, 2013
Health and Wellbeing
Unfortunately, it looks like I have an intolerance to not only dairy but gluten. First and foremost, I want to assure all my blog readers that I am working with a doctor to a) diagnose me and b) help me help myself.
To those who have questions about this, I'm going to give a very simple low-down on what I've done as far as research and how to go about changing one's diet.
1) I stuck with what I knew - Fruit, veggies and potato are safe as is 'real' meat (meaning chicken, beef, or pork - NOT lunchmeat, sausage or anything with a list of ingredients). Since I know I can eat that and not be hurt, that's what I've been eating. I've slowly branched out to gluten-free tortillas, homemade pudding and other foods.
2) I researched - I used websites from nutritionists that sounded valid. Blogs of people who self-diagnose or think every single symptom is a sign of an illness without going to a doctor gets ignored. Blogs that are confusing (ie: say they are dairy free but have a lot of cheese or milk in the recipes) get ignored. I have been using healthfulpursuits.com as a staple lately because it's so simple and healthy.
3) I stay positive - I can look at this two ways: I can't have cake, cookies or cupcakes and that sucks OR I feel better by just modifying my diet. I don't need surgery, I don't need medication for the rest of my life...I'm really lucky! People have allergies and intolerance all the time - peanut butter would be hard for me as would citrus fruit, alcohol or spices...this just means a change, some modifications. Staying positive is healthy in its own right. If it gets frustrating, take a break - go back to a safe food and try again later!
4) Listen to your doctor...and your body. I'm on pills for an ulcer - even if it isn't an ulcer, the pills won't hurt me. I also cut out dairy in my first week and gluten in my second (after he suggested tests for an allergy). So far, I feel amazing. Now, admittedly this could be a placebo effect or even a coincidence - but if I feel good, I'll take it!
5) Make friends - seriously! Make friends with people who have the same allergies or illness. You WILL appreciate the support and knowing that the feelings of being overwhelmed or even scared are normal! They will help you more than I can even express.
6) Ignore some comments - I've had people assume I'm on a diet, a cleanse, I'm just stressed, or every other possible excuse for what 'could' be wrong. I have an intolerance. Because some foods make me feel yucky, I will not be eating them anymore. If I gain or lose weight from it, for now I'll accept it. It's not a cleanse - I don't really buy into those. Yes I'm stressed...I always have been. I don't need a non-medical doctor to attempt to diagnose me (except for my friend Dana who has had this pegged for years!).
So blog world, if you're in the same boat I am - you're going to be okay! Promise...it's a little scary at times but calm down, do some research, and take your health into your own hands!
Here are some of my staples that have helped me along (All gluten and dairy free):
Earth Balance Buttery Spread
Daiya cheese
Gluten free tortillas
Spinach
Bananas
Apples
Potatoes (they are cheap and a carb - BONUS)
Tomatoes
garlic and onion
Fruit (anything on sale!)
Almond milk
Peanut Butter
Chicken thighs
Watermelon
Chocolate Mint oolong tea (check for wheat)
Chai tea (check for wheat)
So that's what is stocked in my freezer! I hope it helps anyone that is dealing with allergies! Have a great night everyone :D
To those who have questions about this, I'm going to give a very simple low-down on what I've done as far as research and how to go about changing one's diet.
1) I stuck with what I knew - Fruit, veggies and potato are safe as is 'real' meat (meaning chicken, beef, or pork - NOT lunchmeat, sausage or anything with a list of ingredients). Since I know I can eat that and not be hurt, that's what I've been eating. I've slowly branched out to gluten-free tortillas, homemade pudding and other foods.
2) I researched - I used websites from nutritionists that sounded valid. Blogs of people who self-diagnose or think every single symptom is a sign of an illness without going to a doctor gets ignored. Blogs that are confusing (ie: say they are dairy free but have a lot of cheese or milk in the recipes) get ignored. I have been using healthfulpursuits.com as a staple lately because it's so simple and healthy.
3) I stay positive - I can look at this two ways: I can't have cake, cookies or cupcakes and that sucks OR I feel better by just modifying my diet. I don't need surgery, I don't need medication for the rest of my life...I'm really lucky! People have allergies and intolerance all the time - peanut butter would be hard for me as would citrus fruit, alcohol or spices...this just means a change, some modifications. Staying positive is healthy in its own right. If it gets frustrating, take a break - go back to a safe food and try again later!
4) Listen to your doctor...and your body. I'm on pills for an ulcer - even if it isn't an ulcer, the pills won't hurt me. I also cut out dairy in my first week and gluten in my second (after he suggested tests for an allergy). So far, I feel amazing. Now, admittedly this could be a placebo effect or even a coincidence - but if I feel good, I'll take it!
5) Make friends - seriously! Make friends with people who have the same allergies or illness. You WILL appreciate the support and knowing that the feelings of being overwhelmed or even scared are normal! They will help you more than I can even express.
6) Ignore some comments - I've had people assume I'm on a diet, a cleanse, I'm just stressed, or every other possible excuse for what 'could' be wrong. I have an intolerance. Because some foods make me feel yucky, I will not be eating them anymore. If I gain or lose weight from it, for now I'll accept it. It's not a cleanse - I don't really buy into those. Yes I'm stressed...I always have been. I don't need a non-medical doctor to attempt to diagnose me (except for my friend Dana who has had this pegged for years!).
So blog world, if you're in the same boat I am - you're going to be okay! Promise...it's a little scary at times but calm down, do some research, and take your health into your own hands!
Here are some of my staples that have helped me along (All gluten and dairy free):
Earth Balance Buttery Spread
Daiya cheese
Gluten free tortillas
Spinach
Bananas
Apples
Potatoes (they are cheap and a carb - BONUS)
Tomatoes
garlic and onion
Fruit (anything on sale!)
Almond milk
Peanut Butter
Chicken thighs
Watermelon
Chocolate Mint oolong tea (check for wheat)
Chai tea (check for wheat)
So that's what is stocked in my freezer! I hope it helps anyone that is dealing with allergies! Have a great night everyone :D
Wednesday, February 6, 2013
My TMI post that you're dying to read about
A few nights ago I went to the emergency room because my toilet looked like a scene from a murder in CSI (I WARNED you this was TMI). Add some intense back pain to the mix and I was getting scared - there was a LOT of blood and I know that's not normal. What else isn't normal is black poo - this can mean two things: 1) lots of iron 2) drier blood in poo. Mine would be number 2 (get it? poo joke!).
Anyways, the doctor asked the usual questions about cramping, pain while going, how long this has been going on, any constipation, runny stool etc etc etc...and gave me medication for a stomach ulcer because lately, everything I eat feels like it's shredding my stomach and back. Diet pepsi and coffee were actually making me cry and break out in sweats (I cut those out). I was drinking some milk in my protein shakes and eating some cheese - also gone.
Anyways, the doctor basically said "You'll live" and let me go with some pills - the problem is that I still don't actually know what's wrong with me. I stopped drinking anything with caffeine in it, still drink about 4L of water daily, am pumping no caffeine tea into my system and yet, I'm still not feeling good...and I'm still bleeding.
So the good news is that I saw a doctor today who actually gives a shit! (Yay for poo joke #2). I got my prescriptions for vaccines but he took a step further and asked about my apparent stomach ulcer...turns out, he's looking at digestive problems and has ordered me to get some additional tests done. Thank goodness.
The hospital here in Saint John actually scares me. It took over 4 weeks (closer to 6 if I remember correctly) for them to diagnose me with a UTI/kidney infection a couple of years ago...by the time diagnosed, I wanted to die because I thought I was crazy and faking it. This is the same hospital that, at the age of 16, I was asked if I was faking depression to get attention (and that doctor was busted a few years ago for child porn...good times). So thankfully, there's one doctor that wants to find out why I feel like crap (bazinga) every time I put certain foods in my system.
Needless to say, all poop jokes aside, I'm rather scared. I don't want to have a problem where I can't eat certain foods...it's not that I won't live - I will - but it's a worry. I tend to obsess over food a LOT and it scares me to think that, now that I'm in control of my food, I may have to obsess a little bit more than I have been. So I'm off to get tests and hoping for the best!
If anyone actually gets past my crappy puns, think of me over the next couple of weeks and wish me luck?
Anyways, the doctor asked the usual questions about cramping, pain while going, how long this has been going on, any constipation, runny stool etc etc etc...and gave me medication for a stomach ulcer because lately, everything I eat feels like it's shredding my stomach and back. Diet pepsi and coffee were actually making me cry and break out in sweats (I cut those out). I was drinking some milk in my protein shakes and eating some cheese - also gone.
Anyways, the doctor basically said "You'll live" and let me go with some pills - the problem is that I still don't actually know what's wrong with me. I stopped drinking anything with caffeine in it, still drink about 4L of water daily, am pumping no caffeine tea into my system and yet, I'm still not feeling good...and I'm still bleeding.
So the good news is that I saw a doctor today who actually gives a shit! (Yay for poo joke #2). I got my prescriptions for vaccines but he took a step further and asked about my apparent stomach ulcer...turns out, he's looking at digestive problems and has ordered me to get some additional tests done. Thank goodness.
The hospital here in Saint John actually scares me. It took over 4 weeks (closer to 6 if I remember correctly) for them to diagnose me with a UTI/kidney infection a couple of years ago...by the time diagnosed, I wanted to die because I thought I was crazy and faking it. This is the same hospital that, at the age of 16, I was asked if I was faking depression to get attention (and that doctor was busted a few years ago for child porn...good times). So thankfully, there's one doctor that wants to find out why I feel like crap (bazinga) every time I put certain foods in my system.
Needless to say, all poop jokes aside, I'm rather scared. I don't want to have a problem where I can't eat certain foods...it's not that I won't live - I will - but it's a worry. I tend to obsess over food a LOT and it scares me to think that, now that I'm in control of my food, I may have to obsess a little bit more than I have been. So I'm off to get tests and hoping for the best!
If anyone actually gets past my crappy puns, think of me over the next couple of weeks and wish me luck?
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