Thoughts of the day

Since I don't have much to write about - it was a slack day - I'm going to put some thoughts on here.

-I don't think you're evil but you piss me off on a daily basis.
-You're probably the best guy I ever dated and I broke my own heart.
-Wedding stories do NOT make breakups easier
-Crying can actually begin to cause pain around the eyes
-I want the occasion to wear a poofy dress
-There's a 40 of vodka in my room but I'm not drinking tonight
-The main thought on my mind: "What if woke up one morning and said, 'I love you'?"
-I miss you...a lot
-I'm going to miss you more than I can even type.
-I want pizza. Greasy yummy pizza...and garlic fingers.

A day without smiling

It's been a weird day - I've been on the verge of crying but haven't cried. I've felt as though my heart is missing something useful - I miss the texts and the hugs...and him.

I keep thinking it's for the best - it is, right? I'm going to Quebec (I hope) in July and when I come back, he won't be there...so break up now means less heartache.

Oh, why can't I go back to just being witty right now. I think I like me more that way. I do believe vodka and I are going to have a strong relationship tonight.

Love is like Skittles or other gummy foods

I'm still a fan of happy endings - to all the smart-asses out there that are pulling down their pants, I will play 'nutslap' so don't even start with me however, at this moment in my life I have established that love is something like eating skittles.

A few skittles are the equivalent of dating - you feel good, you're happy, you have a bit of a rush...it's awesome!

Later on, you ate WAY too many skittles and now your stomach hurts, you've gained 10lbs, and you realize you're pooping a rainbow of colours - not so good.

There has to be balance - and that's something I'm lacking. I don't have time to eat skittles right now - I have things to do...So love, you're on the backburner for a few more years.

I'll miss you

Part of university means watching your friends grow up and move away - but that doesn't make it any easier.

So instead of saying goodbye, I'm asking my friends who moved away to make a promise:

Promise to be happy in the path you choose and if you're not, don't be afraid to go down another road.

The Breakup

Unlike a movie, this kind of hurts more than I wanted it too. My idea was the sooner I break up with him, the easier it would be - because right now I just want to lay in my bed and cry.

I know his reasoning is 'have fun now - enjoy time together' but I just keep feeling closer and closer and finding more things about him that I like...and I didn't want to end up hurt.

So yes, it's for the best. But no, it's not easy or good or something that I should be congratulated on. Honestly, I just want to pretend nothing needs to be done this weekend...which isn't true.